Everyday

Monday

2007-08-20T19:00:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Luke started a new job today. Years ago, on his 1st day of work after graduating from college, he kindly sent me an email titled "First email" and included his new phone and a short message about how things are going. Sharing his excitement and a small life experience and ensuring I had his new email address is thoughtful. Luke's always been incredibly thoughtful.

He's changed jobs quite a bit the past few years - in order to take on challenges and contiue learning while I've been at the same job for 6 years (as of today, as a matter of fact).

Last night Luke and I laughed about how I've sent him one "1st email" and he's sent me 5 or 6.

Thought and Emotion
On Nameless, I described the very tiring post office errand which took 75 minutes over lunch. Upon return, when I pulled into a parking space at the office, I let out a long sign and rested my head on the seat back.

I was reminded of my 1st manager, Mary, who is incredibly smart, tenacious and works and plays hard. One day, she took me out to lunch and we got back to the office a few minutes early. We pulled into the parking space, looked at the clock, simultaneously leaned our seats back and snoozed, quietly and peacefully, for 10 minutes.

Friday

2007-08-17T13:47:00.000-05:00

Laughter and thought

Luke turned 31 years of age this week. For his birthday, he asked for larger coffee mugs. This morning, with a new mug full of hot tea in hand, he said:

"You know you're in your thirties when you ask for coffee mugs for your birthday. Ten years ago, I would have said [upon receipt of coffee mugs as a gift] 'Uh, thanks.' Then thrown the mugs in the trash."

Emotion
Today is my former manager's last day here. He's incredibly kind and I'm so thankful for all he's done for me, so this change and good-bye is emotional. I'm also saddened today after learning someone from home has died. For someone my age to die so young, it's unfair, especially someone so kind.

Monday

2007-08-13T13:29:00.000-05:00

Today's not a good day. Everyday is typically the place for positive thoughts but Luke and I are sharing some stress and I just can't seem to get over the hump today.

Laughter and Emotion
Canaan, Megan and Angela were here this past weekend for our annual girls trip and the four of us shared a lot of laughs. Now that they have returned home, I miss them terribly.

Thought
I've been thinking a lot about things left unsaid. Nothing in particular, just pondering why we choose to say certain things and keep quiet about others.

Monday

2007-08-06T10:13:00.000-05:00

Laughter

This morning I smiled when I received an adorable text message from my best friend. My three best girlfriends from high school are coming to visit this week for an all-out fun girls weekend. I can't wait!

I smiled again just now after getting a cup of hot chocolate from the coffee shop downstairs. Although Texas summers are hot, the building I work in is cold and I drink hot chocolate year-round. Hot chocolate is my favorite drink.

Thought and Emotion
My Dad called me this morning to tell me about a small gift he and Mom got for Luke and I (an Acie Law IV bobble head doll). He was laughing and being funny and silly and it made me think about the fact that he beat cancer. Maybe not for good but the laughter in his voice makes it hard to think otherwise.

I was reading an article this morning, the individual being interviewed was talking about "being in love". I got tingles all over thinking about Luke and how deeply I care for him.

Friday

2007-08-03T23:08:00.001-05:00

Laughter
Tonight we took Acie for a walk and ran into neighbors with an 18 month old black lab. We've seen the couple and their pup a couple of times over the past few weeks and always say hello. Tonight, the four of us chatted as our pups played together and rolled around on the grass. I love making new friends, Acie does too.

Thought
I read a lovely post on Lisa's blog which caused a great deal of thought and inspiration to "paddle with the tide". I also downloaded Gimp, a free photo imaging software application, and completed a couple of turtorials. I'm eager to learn about digital image manipulation.

Emotion
This afternoon I talked on the phone for about a half hour to a very dear friend, a family friend. With busy lives and many miles between us, we don't get to talk often and it was refreshing to hear about how she and her family are doing.

Wednesday

2007-08-01T14:01:00.000-05:00

Laughter
Luke and I had lunch with friends today and laughed catching up and telling stories

Thought
A line from an episode of The West Wing we watched last night remained on my mind today and I've spent time thinking about people and organizations. In a meeting with Deputy Chief of Staff Josh Lyman, a congressman rhetorically asks:
"Why don't all anti-NRA individuals just join the NRA and vote in opposition. That would be the end of [the gun control debate]".
The "can't beat them join them and beat them" approach is interesting. What would happen if those opposed to the core values of an organzation were in the same room as those who do not oppose? Would everyone's voice be heard, continuing the debate?

Organizations take on the ideas and behaviors of its members, but in this case, what would most likely happen is the original members in favor of current gun control laws would leave the NRA and form a new, perhaps, stronger organization .

Emotion
I had sort of a bad day this morning and by 10 am, was quite grumpy. Driving to a work meeting and rushing to avoid being late, I put on one of my favorite Tom Petty songs to avert my tears. And it helped. Free Fallin' works almost everytime.

Monday

2007-07-30T21:55:00.000-05:00

Laughter
Luke and I were cuddling on the couch together watching The West Wing. I can't remember what was said to encourage this response, but he made a face at me and a peace sign and I burst into laughter. We watched one of my favorite episodes, Press Secretary CJ has to choose the more photogenic of 2 turkeys, Troy and Eric, at Thanksgiving.

Thought
Today I thought about photography.

Emotion
The hot summer temperature reminded me of how Mom used to buckle the seatbelt for me when I was little. The handle was metal and would get really hot, so she'd reach over and buckle me in, ensuring I was safe.

Monday

2007-06-04T23:23:00.000-05:00

Laughter

A friend has been staying with us since Sunday evening. Laughing over dinner and stories with good friends makes life so sweet.

Thought

I've received compliments on photographs I've taken from a few of my friends this week. I'm so insecure about my creative side but am really thinking - maybe this is what I should do with my life.

Emotion

Marriage and life-long committment has stirred up my emotions today. Even when two people love eachother, it doesn't guarentee a lifetime of happiness. Terrifying. Luke and I haven't argued in months - which is great. I don't think there's anything wrong with arguing, as long as you are respectful toward one another. I love Luke with all my heart but am sometimes terrified of the future, the unknown.

Friday

2007-06-01T12:11:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Acie laid down on a blanket on the floor in our bedroom this morning which is nothing extraordinary but I love the look on his little face when he makes himself at home. He's so sweet and makes me smile each and every day

Thought

Today I've been thinking about delegation, as in delegating tasks to others. I've taken on a leadership role at work, not a managment position, just leading activities and am learning more and more each day.

Emotion

Earlier, I stopped by a co-worker's desk to inquire about lunch and discovered they were crying. I wanted to cry with them or do something but knew there was nothing which could be done. Sometimes pain and heartache really are in the air.

Thursday

2007-05-31T23:28:00.000-05:00

Today I cried for Mr. Scovil. I miss him terribly. I've thought of him everyday the past year, he brought a great deal of joy to life.

Wednesday

2007-05-30T14:21:00.000-05:00

Laughter

I was talking to a friend and co-worker earlier about a really serious topic. We shared a laugh because sometimes, it's laugh or cry. I also shed a tear this morning getting ready for work because I sliced my index finger. The cut is deep and I have 3 band-aids on so I can type.

Emotional Thought

I've thought a lot about family today. After the shake-up this weekend in the dymanics at home due to a guest doggie, I'm so grateful for Luke, Acie and everyone in my family.

Tuesday

2007-05-29T12:29:00.001-05:00

Emotional thought

I can't stop thinking about the Golden we've been taking care of since Saturday. He was lost and it was the right thing to do to take him in, but I get so attached to people and things in life and it's going to be very difficult saying good-bye.

No laughter today.

Monday

2007-05-28T17:34:00.001-05:00

Laughter
Luke and I laughed hanging out together at a baseball game this afternoon

Thought

We watched Dead Poets Society last night - fantastic movie. I've been thinking about conformity all day.

Emotion

We've been watching a lost dog all weekend and I'm emotionally attached. I hope the pup finds his family and that they are looking for him. If not, he has a home here with Luke, Acie and I.

Friday

2007-05-25T23:23:00.000-05:00

Laughter and Emotion

I called my Mom today to wish her and Dad Happy Wedding Anniversary. We talked for a while, laughing and telling stories. My parents are great role models, the older I get, the more I want to be like them. Even when they are a little nuts.

Thought

Tonight Luke and I watched the Texas A&M softball team in a Super-Regional game on ESPN. I played softball for 11 years, from age 7 to 18. In high school I was on a competitive team during the summer where everyday meant driving 45 mintues one-way to practice from the hottest hour of the afternoon until sun-down, all the while our coaches pushing us harder and harder, and every weekend meant traveling with the team to a tournament. Our goals were to compete in the National Championship at the end of the season and to prepare ourselves to play at the next level. I didn't share the dream of a softball scholarship, I knew Texas A&M was the only college for me and I wasn't talented enough to play there as my sister did. I was there to be part of the team and because athletics was my life when I was growing up.

I spent more time with those 15 girls than my friends whom I went to school with or even my family. It wasn't a sacrifice, even at 16 I realized it was an amazing opportunity. Those two years of complete dedication to softball did turn out to be an experience which defines me. Our coaches told us we would always remember our team mates and they were right, more than 10 years later I can see each of their faces and the memories come rushing back. I've never worked harder for anything in life and had so much fun at the same time. Seeing the Aggies (who won, the 1st game in a best of 3) tonight reminded me what it feels like to work for something and how sweet success can be when you accomplish something as a team.

Wednesday

2007-05-23T22:19:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Luke and I were cracking up laughing tonight over a Mastercard "Priceless" commercial. In the ad, a little boy in kindergarten wearing a back-pack (nearly as big as he is) is dancing freely in the school hallway. "Backpack, $20", says the Narrator.

2 other kindergarten boys join him in the hall and start dancing. They aren't just moving from side to side, they are really creative, carefree and do not care if anyone sees them dancing. Clearly, it's their thing and they are happy so, they dance.

Que Narrator - "Being with friends who get you, Priceless".

Thought

Luke and I discussed the concept of doing better when you know better.

Emotion

Soundy cheesy, but I got emotional watching tv tonight, one of my favorite characters died. The way he died was so sad - he felt it was his fate and wanted to save his girlfriend, her baby and people he met who had become family.

The thing I like about this show is the idea that an experience in life or a place, perhaps, can transform you. I wonder what that time or place is for me.

Sunday

2007-05-20T23:37:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Luke and I laughed so much today, talking and listening to Celine Dion on the drive home from a weekend in Houston, on the couch watching DVDs of House and during a trip to the grocery store together. We always laugh a lot on Sundays - lazy, care-free Sundays are meant for family and laughter.

Thought

I thought a lot about plans to host a summer party in the next month - the invitations, the menu, the cocktails and the entertainment - movie-night in the back yard.

Emotion

Acie, Luke and I stayed at my sister Tasha's house in Houston for the weekend. I love her house - it's such a reflection of her and is filled with photographs, personal touches and style. The guest room was so comfy and Luke and I slept so soundly. Acie had a good time, he was glad not to be at the kennel and to play with Tasha's King Charles spaniel named Reagan. We had a good time going out for breakfast, chatting, telling stories and laughing in Tasha's living room and I can't wait to go back and visit her and Travis soon.

Thursday

2007-05-17T15:39:00.000-05:00

Laughter
I had lunch at my favorite sandwich shop and laughed at the manager's brightly colored, festive shirt. I wasn't laughing at him - he's sooo nice and knows my name. The fun colors made me smile.

Thought

Today, I've been thinking about personal characteristics - the little things about a person that make them unique. People are so interesting - and it's fun to think about the experiences, environments, genes and emotions which make us who we are.

Emotion
Luke and I have a date night tonight. We're making dinner and watching the season finale of Grey's Anatomy at home together. With Acie, of course.

2007-05-14T23:30:00.000-05:00

Laughter, Thought and Emotion

Lately I've been reflecting on life. Gramma's 100th has a lot to do with it, knowing and loving somone who is 100 years of age forces you to think about living one's life to the fullest. I think about all the little pieces which add up to the "big picture". And I hope, dream and love.

Sunday

2007-05-13T20:54:00.000-05:00

Thought and Emotion

I thought about characteristics shared with my Mom and wish I was more like her and my Grandmothers. My heart is full of love for my Mom. Luke was very thoughtful and kind to give me flowers today, because he hasn't done so in a long time and I'm Acie's Mom.

Laughter

My Mom and I laughed together talking on the phone.

Saturday

2007-05-12T22:31:00.000-05:00

Emotion

Today was my Gramma's 100th birthday party. My Mom and her sisters planned a lovely family celebration for her. Our family gathered round Gramma and a beautifully decorated cake with "1" "0" and "0" candles to sing "Happy Birthday". As the magnitude of the event was realized, my eyes swelled with tears. 100 years. Happy Birthday to my Gramma, a truly kind, wise, generous, creative and beautiful human being whom I love dearly.

Laughter

After the party, I laughed with my brother, sisters, cousins and their children, nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles, parents and grandma as we told stories and made precious memories at Gramma's house. The house was full of love and family which brings me so much joy.

Thought

Today I thought about longevity and how family is at the center of so many great things in life.

Friday

2007-05-11T16:09:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Elton John, live in Vegas, is on the brain and causing me to giggle. While introducing drummer Nigel Olsson, a member of Elton's band since day 1, Elton commented "I think it's cute how Nigel dressed to match his drum set."

Thought

Humans are undoubtedly flawed and naturally make mistakes. Everyday. Today I thought about mistakes I've made and the mistakes of others. It's sometimes difficult to be understanding when others do not take responsibility for their actions and expect you to do so on their behalf. We all do it though, it's diffucult to admit mistakes and understand the impact of our actions sometimes.

Emotion

Tomorrow, our entire family is gathering in Ft. Worth to celebrate Gramma's Books 100th birthday. She's truly an amazing human being, spirit, heart and mind. I love Gramma deeply and feel so blessed to know her and be her grandaughter. Gramma is one of a kind and the type of person we should all strive to be - smart, kind, independent, creative, fun and gracious.

Live from Las Vegas

2007-05-10T16:13:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Tuesday of this week, Luke and I saw Elton John in concert in Las Vegas. An icon who has performed in front of millions and earned millions, he's not surprisingly larger than life.

"This year marked my 60th birthday and our 166th performance at (Caesar's Palace) Colusseum. Each time I get up to walk the stage, address the audience and walk back to the piano, it seems to take longer, and longer and longer".

Like so many entertainers, it not so much what he says that is funny but his charasma, unique voice and presence. And, of course, the classic Brittish accent.

Thought

Luke was attending a convention in Vegas on business, during the day I was alone with my thoughts. Far away from work, I thought about my life and what is meaningful and sweet. For the first time in a long time, I really heard my thoughts, without distractions or "I'll think about that later". And there was no worrying. What to do next. Where to be next. Complete relaxation and peace.

Emotion

Music brings out emotion, especially love ballads sung live by a legendary pianist and artist such as Elton John. Listening to "Believe", "Your Song" and "Someone Saved My Life Tonight" sitting next to Luke in Las Vegas and celebrating our anniversary brought me a great deal of happiness, the kind that tingles all over.

Monday

2007-05-07T00:00:00.000-05:00

Laughter and Emotion

I'll be squeeling with excitement later today when Luke and I arrive in Las Vegas!

Thought

It's Monday morning after a busy weekend and not getting enough sleep last night. It's overcast today in Austin and I left for the office earlier than usual. Traffic was light this morning, the busiest intersection on the route to work was empty and I thought to myself, "Do I have my days mixed up or is today Monday?" Sigh. I really need a break from work and this trip to Vegas to celebrate our wedding anniversary couldn't come at a better time.

Sunday

2007-05-06T22:04:00.000-05:00

Laughter, Thought and Emotion

We've been in our house about 18 months, this is our 1st house. We finally were able to have grass put in the back yard this Spring. The 1st time I stepped on the grass in a yard of my very own, I did a kart wheel. I haven't had a back yard in 10 years since I was 18, graduated from high school and moved out of my parents house to attend college.

Today I thought about my kart wheel and how silly I can be.

I began thinking about the past 10 years and how much I've grown in my 20's (with 18 months to go). They say the second decade of one's life can be a selfish time. I'm not an overly selfish person but it's true, most of my energy the past 8 years has been focused on me.

College provides a 1st glance at some responsibility and the ability to make your own choices, graduating and transitioning into the workforce is an even bigger challenge. Financial independence and making one's way in the world are experiences which mold who you are. In our 20's most of us have experienced deep, true love and are either in a lifelong committment, broken-hearted or both.

At age 28, I know myself and my motivations, fears, strengths, weaknesses, passions and dislikes. I spend a lot of my time thinking about improving myself and am well aware of characteristics which cause me pain and the areas of my life which are not figured out. I wouldn't want it any other way but hope a deeper level of confidence is in store for the 3rd decade of my life.

"Good decisions are made from experience. Experience is gained by making bad decisions."

Saturday

2007-05-05T22:36:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Luke mowed the grass today then took Acie to play fetch in the creek near our house. I always give Acie a bath after he swims in the creek. I hosed him off, lathered shampoo on his coat and scrubbed away. As I rinsed him off, his collar slipped off and he jumped and ran through the yard, rolling in the fresh cut grass and looking up at me with his adorable face and ears perked.

Clean for nearly 4 seconds, that is his personal best.

Thought and Emotion

Today, I thought about my Dad's cancer diagnosis and treatment. I'm so grateful he's in remission and able to enjoy life. I'm still in awe by what his doctors were able to do to help him get better, but not as amazed as I am by my parent's strength through it all. It's terrifying to think of losing a parent, and cancer forces one to do so. I haven't felt afraid of losing my Dad in months, and today, I felt more hopeful than afraid. Mom and Dad are driving from Texas to North Carolina next month to visit friends. They are living each day despite the fearful things in this world.

Friday

2007-05-04T23:59:00.000-05:00

Laughter

I laughed during a trailer prior to Spiderman 3 for "Surf's Up", an animated movie. One of the characters is a chicken and says "I can feel it in my nuggets". Think about it, then laugh.

Thought

I've got a career choice to make which requires a great deal of thought. I'm not sure what I want to do or the "right" choice.

Emotion

Prints of photos from our vacation in March to the NCAA tournament in Lexington arrived today. I looked through the photos and smiled, it was a fantastic trip. Relaxing, fun and exciting, a trip Luke and I will always remember.

Thursday

2007-05-03T16:34:00.000-05:00

Laughter

I laughed at lunch today with my friend Keith. Movies are a common topic for our weekly lunches, he's had a Netflix subscription for awhile and I just recently joined. I laughed when he said he'd reviewed every movie he'd ever heard of, to the tune of 1200, in order to figure out the algorithm of how Netflix provides recommendations. Um, yes, we are information technology professionals. Anywho, he offered to add me as a friend in Netflix, so we can recommend movies to eachother.

I've known Keith for years. Who knew he was some sort of Netflix god?

Thought

I can honestly say I have not dedicated enough time to thought today. My brain is very, very tired.

Emotion
It's been a busy day at work and unfortunately I haven't spoken to Luke since leaving the house this morning. After 9 years together and 3 years of marriage (8 May!), I miss him during the day or anytime we are apart, especially when time doesn't allow us to email or check-in with one another.

Wednesday

2007-05-02T23:49:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Luke and I laughed in the car on the way to College Station as we talked and shared our day together. He shared something silly he's working on at work, ensuring insignificant data is secure and explaining the hierarchies of "headings" for listings. Laughing about work puts it all in perspective, doesn't it? Upon arrival in Aggieland, we were listening to an Elton John cd and dancing in our seats, as we often do. Shine a light, won't you shine a li-ght!? Phil-a-del-phia freedom, I lo-ve you, yes I do!

Something funny just happened as I'm writing. Luke was reading stock options for the founders and executives at Google in their annual report and came into the office to share. Acie, always wanting to be part of the pack, went to the other room, grabbed the report in his slobbery mouth and carried it into the office. Now he's looking at us with adorable puppy dog eyes, knowing he's made us laugh and our full attention is now his.

Emotion

Tonight was emotional as we attended the Texas A&M men's basketball banquet at Reed arena, marking the end of a memorable season. We love this team and enjoyed every second of the season.

After dinner, the highlight show and awards, Luke and I looked at action shots placed around the arena floor. Junior defensive player of the year and hustle award winner, #22, Dominique Kirk posed for a photo with Luke and I. Dominique is polite, genuine and a fan-favorite with a brilliant smile. He signed an autograph for us after the team's 2nd round tournament win against Louisville in Lexington - a season highlight for us. We enjoyed another opportunity to tell Dominique how proud we are of him and the team, and know he appreciates the gesture.

On our way to leave, we ran into Acie Law's parents, whom we met earlier in the season. "Be sure to tell Acie good luck [in the NBA] for us. We'll be watching him.", I said. "Oh, thank you. Keep him in your thoughts and prayers", she responded. We will, always. Talking to Mrs. Law brought back all the great moments of the season and the adoration Luke and I have for her son, Acie, causing tears to well and immediately fall down my face. This season was remarkable, and Acie was at the center of it all.

Thought

On the drive home to Austin, we encountered thunderstorms and heavy lightening for the duration of the trip. As lightening flashed and lit up the sky in all directions, Luke and I both commented on its beauty. Breathtaking, really. The lightening struck very close and I became frightened. Nature is forceful, I need to understood more about science.

Tuesday

2007-05-01T00:59:00.000-05:00

Laughter

Today, Luke and I laughed on the couch together as we rehearsed a scene from House, M.D. House has been critically injured and through surgery. Wilson's running on a treadmill and says to House, "You know, it doesn't really help if you have someone else do the re-hab for you". Luke and I love House, the character is so unique and makes us laugh. Especially the scenes with Wilson.

Just a few minutes ago, my favorite episode of Sex and the City, season 4's "The Good Fight", aired.
Carrie, to Aidan as she rummages through his toiletries: "Rogaine! Wait. Rogaine. I didn't know...
Aidan, defensively responds, "It's preventative!"
Carrie: "....Is your hair falling out?"
Aidan: "I don't want to talk about it!"

Despite the late hour, lack of sleep and seeing this particular episode at least 20 times, I laughed. Out loud. Alone on the couch. It's one of my favorite scenes of the series and all television.

Thought and emotion (I imagine these will often be combined)

Last night I had a dream about a friend I haven't talked to in months, he lives in New York with his family. Later in the day, I thought about what a good person he is and how grateful I am for our friendship and the positive impact it's had on my life. I thought about how rare it is for relationships to last for many years, not because we no longer think or care about that person, but because we are all living our lives. Memories passed through my mind and I smiled, knowing there are some people who live in our hearts and minds forever.

Mission

2007-05-01T00:40:00.000-05:00

Seven years ago, I learned of and read for the 1st time a speech given by Jimmy Valvano weeks before losing one of life's toughest battles. Cancer. Coach V's message is universal, significant, passionate and inspirational.

Each day, this outlet will be used to document my life in terms of laughter, thought and emotion.

From the Jimmy V Foundation website:

On March 4, 1993, Jim Valvano was awarded the inaugural Arthur Ashe Courage and Humanitarian Award at the first annual ESPY Awards. The following is his acceptance speech.

"Thank you, Thank you very much. Thank you. That's the lowest I've ever seen Dick Vitale since the owner of the Detroit Pistons called him in and told him he should go into broadcasting. I can't tell you what an honor it is, to even be mentioned in the same breath with Arthur Ashe. This is something I certainly will treasure forever. But, as it was said on the tape, and I also don't have one of those things going with the cue cards, so I'm going to speak longer than anybody else has spoken tonight. That's the way it goes. Time is very precious to me. I don't know how much I have left and I have some things that I would like to say. Hopefully, at the end, I will have said something that will be important to other people too.

But, I can't help it. Now I'm fighting cancer, everybody knows that. People ask me all the time about how you go through your life and how's your day, and nothing is changed for me. As Dick said, I'm a very emotional and passionate man. I can't help it. That's being the son of Rocco and Angelina Valvano. It comes with the territory. We hug, we kiss, we love. When people say to me how do you get through life or each day, it's the same thing.

To me, there are three things we all should do every day. We should do this every day of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. Number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that's a full day. That's a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you're going to have something special.

I rode on the plane up today with Mike Krzyzewski, my good friend and wonderful coach. People don't realize he's ten times a better person than he is a coach, and we know he's a great coach. He's meant a lot to me in these last five or six months with my battle. But when I look at Mike, I think, we competed against each other as players. I coached against him for fifteen years, and I always have to think about what's important in life to me are these three things. Where you started, where you are and where you're going to be. Those are the three things that I try to do every day. When I think about getting up and giving a speech, I can't help it. I have to remember the first speech I ever gave. I was coaching at Rutgers University, that was my first job, oh that's wonderful (reaction to applause), and I was the freshman coach. That's when freshmen played on freshman teams, and I was so fired up about my first job. I see Lou Holtz here. Coach Holtz, who doesn't like the very first job you had? The very first time you stood in the locker room to give a pep talk. That's a special place, the locker room, for a coach to give a talk. So my idol as a coach was Vince Lombardi, and I read this book called "Commitment To Excellence" by Vince Lombardi. And in the book, Lombardi talked about the fist time he spoke before his Green Bay Packers team in the locker room, and they were perennial losers. I'm reading this and Lombardi said he was thinking should it be a long talk, or a short talk? But he wanted it to be emotional, so it would be brief. So here's what I did. Normally you get in the locker room, I don't know, twenty-five minutes, a half hour before the team takes the field, you do your little x and o's, and then you give the great Knute Rockne talk. We all do. Speech number eight-four. You pull them right out, you get ready. You get your squad ready. Well, this is the first one I ever gave and I read this thing. Lombardi, what he said was he didn't go in, he waited. His team wondering, where is he? Where is this great coach? He's not there. Ten minutes he's still not there. Three minutes before they could take the field Lombardi comes in, bangs the door open, and I think you all remember what great presence he had, great presence. He walked in and he walked back and forth, like this, just walked, staring at the players. He said, "All eyes on me." I'm reading this in this book. I'm getting this picture of Lombardi before his first game and he said "Gentlemen, we will be successful this year, if you can focus on three things, and three things only. Your family, your religion and the Green Bay Packers." They knocked the walls down and the rest was history. I said, that's beautiful. I'm going to do that. Your family, your religion and Rutgers basketball. That's it. I had it. Listen, I'm twenty-one years old. The kids I'm coaching are nineteen, and I'm going to be the greatest coach in the world, the next Lombardi. I'm practicing outside of the locker room and the managers tell me you got to go in. Not yet, not yet, family, religion, Rutgers Basketball. All eyes on me. I got it, I got it. Then finally he said, three minutes, I said fine.

True story. I go to knock the doors open just like Lombardi. Boom! They don't open. I almost broke my arm. Now I was down, the players were looking. Help the coach out, help him out. Now I did like Lombardi, I walked back and forth, and I was going like that with my arm getting the feeling back in it. Finally I said, "Gentlemen, all eyes on me." These kids wanted to play, they're nineteen. "Let's go," I said. "Gentlemen, we'll be successful this year if you can focus on three things, and three things only. Your family, your religion and the Green Bay Packers," I told them. I did that. I remember that. I remember where I came from.

It's so important to know where you are. I know where I am right now. How do you go from where you are to where you want to be? I think you have to have an enthusiasm for life. You have to have a dream, a goal. You have to be willing to work for it.

I talked about my family, my family's so important. People think I have courage. The courage in my family are my wife Pam, my three daughters, here, Nicole, Jamie, LeeAnn, my mom, who's right here too. That screen is flashing up there thirty seconds like I care about that screen right now, huh? I got tumors all over my body. I'm worried about some guy in the back going thirty seconds? You got a lot, hey va fa napoli, buddy. You got a lot. I just got one last thing, I urge all of you, all of you, to enjoy your life, the precious moments you have. To spend each day with some laughter and some thought, to get you're emotions going. To be enthusiastic every day and as Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Nothing great could be accomplished without enthusiasm," to keep your dreams alive in spite of problems whatever you have. The ability to be able to work hard for your dreams to come true, to become a reality. Now I look at where I am now and I know what I want to do. What I would like to be able to do is spend whatever time I have left and to give, and maybe, some hope to others. Arthur Ashe Foundation is a wonderful thing, and AIDS, the amount of money pouring in for AIDS is not enough, but is significant. But if I told you it's ten times the amount that goes in for cancer research. I also told you that five hundred thousand people will die this year of cancer. I also tell you that one in every four will be afflicted with this disease, and yet somehow, we seem to have put it in a little bit of the background. I want to bring it back on the front table. We need your help. I need your help. We need money for research. It may not save my life. It may save my children's lives. It may save someone you love. And ESPN has been so kind to support me in this endeavor and allow me to announce tonight, that with ESPN's support, which means what? Their money and their dollars and they're helping me-we are starting the Jimmy V Foundation for Cancer Research. And it's motto is

"Don't give up, don't ever give up."

That's what I'm going to try to do every minute that I have left. I will thank God for the day and the moment I have. If you see me, smile and give me a hug. That's important to me too. But try if you can to support, whether it's AIDS or the cancer foundation, so that someone else might survive, might prosper and might actually be cured of this dreaded disease. I can't thank ESPN enough for allowing this to happen. I'm going to work as hard as I can for cancer research and hopefully, maybe, we'll have some cures and some breakthroughs. I'd like to think, I'm going to fight my brains out to be back here again next year for the Arthur Ashe recipient. I want to give it next year!

I know, I gotta go, I gotta go, and I got one last thing and I said it before, and I want to say it again. Cancer can take away all my physical abilities. It cannot touch my mind, it cannot touch my heart and it cannot touch my soul. And those three things are going to carry on forever. I thank you and God bless you all."